It was raining. I was not pleased. And by not pleased, I mean completely losing my flipping mind, because it was not supposed to be raining on my wedding day. It is possible I was a little nervous.
The flowers were supposed to be blue cornflowers with white carnations. They were purple. I was not pleased. And by not pleased I mean losing my mind with the thought that my really pretty royal blue bridesmaids dresses(meaning terribly ugly electric blue. And, by the way, I am sure am sorry to my four bridesmaids for making them wear that. Cause really? You sooooooo could not cut it off and wear it again. EVER. You could cut it up and use it for tourniquets on the battlefield, maybe. But, that's about as close as you could get)would clash with the purple flowers. It's possible I was a tiny bit nervous.
Ok, I admit it, I was nervous. And by nervous, I mean I was scared to death. But there was this moment. This one moment. I remember it with such clarity. It wasn't that moment when I first saw him that day. It wasn't the moment he smiled at me when I was hesitation stepping down the aisle. It was the moment that my hand was laid in his. I stared at that simple image for a moment. My hand in his. I looked at it for a long moment before I looked up and looked at him. It washed over me like a cool breeze on a fall afternoon. And suddenly? It was all right. All of it. The rain was perfect. The flowers were perfect. In that moment, it was all perfect.
Eighteen years. It has been eighteen years since that day. We were only kids. I was 19. He was 21. We talked about waiting, but decided... really? Wait for what? We knew it was right. We have been through more than our fair share of good times. We have also been through more than our fair share of crap. We have had rough patches. We have been mad. We have cried. We have laughed. We have rejoiced. But through it all, we have been just that, WE. It hasn't been easy. At times, it has been incredibly hard. But, we never gave up, even though there were times one or both of us wanted to. Together, we molded what we both wanted more than anything, a family.
We have gone from two kids engaged,
to a married family of two,
to a solid family of five, able to love and laugh and cry together through all the good times and the bad.
Ronnie, you are my friend and husband, the father of my children, the one who can always make me laugh, the one who lets me steal all the pillows, the one who lets me act like a fool, the one who laughs at all my stupid jokes, the one who loves me unconditionally and lets me love him back. Thank you. Thank you for continuing to put up with me. Happy anniversary!
Love to all~